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From Heaven to Hell


This week’s meditations have been shape shifting. I am blessed and happy to say I generally always have meditations full of gifts, messages and most importantly a deep connection to the light. But this week the shift was so great, I can now only see my connection continuing to elevate.

In my meditations, I always start with walking on the grass, next to a river with my destination a small pool of water anchored with trees and mountain views all around. As I’m walking I feel the light around me, it’s like this meditation space is all light. As I sit next to the water (I will wait for another day and another blog to talk about the amazing healing power of water), I not only feel like the light around, but I feel it inside my cells, moving through my body, and it clearing my energy. The light heals me and lifts me up. Then the light source is flowing through me and illuminating all around. It’s almost as I become a source to share light. I’m grateful every day for this connection.

This likely seems intense compared to most meditations or what the mediation books “say to do” and flat out crazy to those that don’t meditate at all. I think it’s important to note that my mother is a psychic. Yep, she does readings for a living and has been an amazing blessing and gift to me on my own spiritual and psychic journey. My mom has always assured me I can just hear and see things most people choose not to. I feel blessed to have her gift (although tiny little muscles compared to hers) and to have a guide to learn how to explore it.

My meditations bring me to the real thoughts of my blog, the euphoria I experienced recently after a mediation. On a beautiful morning, I’m driving in my car all alone and I start thinking how grateful I am for my life. Now let me be clear. Looking from the outside in, my life is FAR from perfect. But I chose to focus on all that is good, and feel grateful and blessed. As I’m driving down the street the feeling of gratitude keeps growing. In a single moment my energy shifts and it’s like white light is being wrapped around me. I feel like I’m touching heaven. Every cell in my body is connected to the greater good. My energy is dancing and at peace all at the same time. My eyes fill with tears of love and gratitude as I have never experienced anything so pure.

You would think I felt this way with the major life events that have occurred like becoming a mother or getting married/divorced (just kidding X-hubby 😊) or publishing my book. And of course, I did on some level but nothing has ever connected to me in a single moment to such euphoria.

I get out of my car and I think this is going to be a glorious day. Nothing could shake me down. I grab my coffee and head to my desk to tackle my day (and it’s a Friday so I know it will be a kick ass day.) Well it wasn’t. Not even close. As I sat at my desk and had meeting after meeting, with challenge after challenge, my energy quickly shifted. Not only did it shift it took a slide straight to hell. The shift was completely my choice. Because I am a believer that I choose my energy every day and I decided to connect to the challenges and negativity of circumstances around me and not to the high vibration I have access to (we all have access to) every moment.

By noon, I’m completely miserable. I’m angry, I’m mad and I’m ready to tell my job to suck it. Admittedly this was one of most challenging days I’ve ever had in the office. I’m not sure why the storm of BS decided to present itself on a Friday before a long weekend, but it did. As I’m sinking to hell and connecting to nothing but bitterness, I realize I need to run out and see my chiropractor, Dr. Mark Armbruster. I think for a minute that I should cancel my appointment since the storm of BS is quickly escalating to a tornado and can’t imagine stepping away from my desk for an hour. Then a moment of clarity hits me and I realize I absolutely have to go, as my treatments from my car accident are a priority to getting better.

I once again hop in my car, thinking about all the emails and things I need to tackle at my desk as I drive off to my appointment. While driving, I think how is my Dr. Mark going to be able to help me get better when I’m hanging out in hell right now with this horrible energy. I then remember how my morning started and oddly I can’t even find a way back to that high vibe space. I recognize I need to shift my energy and I start to breathe. Deep chest filing breathes that I know will help.. As I breath in, I imagine connecting to happy positive energy and as I breathe out I imagine I’m releasing all the negativity of the day. As I arrive to the his office, I’m still in hell but definitely making the climb out. In the waiting room, I keep working on my breath. Then the best thing happens, I start letting go. I let go of the meetings, and the challenges and the negative energy. As I let go, my energy starts moving again. It’s literally and figuratively getting lighter as I wait for my appointment.

By the time I’m driving home, I’m seeing the light. The negative energy has a hold on my feet while I’m finishing the climb out of hell, but it’s no match for positive thoughts. To choose not to connect to negative thoughts, to let it all go as they say, was an immediate shift. As I enter my home, I’m a different person. I can’t say I was back to the euphoria I had experienced that morning (and I feel like that’s a special gift anyway) but I was back to my general positive cool state. 😉 As soon as I was connected to that positive energy again, everything started to shift. I received a funny and kind text message from one of my sons, a big task that needed do get done that afternoon simply went away, I received good news on a concert I was hoping to go to with family and friends, my body hurt less and the evening continued with positive little surprises. I was back!

I wanted to share the heaven to hell back to earth trip I experienced within a few short hours because I feel like this is such as common challenge for most of us. As we go through our day we choose what we want to connect to. I started with a connection to the highest energy (heaven like) and I LET myself slide into hell. I am still learning how to stay connected during challenging times and yesterday was a great lesson on watching myself react to circumstances instead of choosing my response. It’s another law of attraction for me to workout – choosing my response instead of reacting.

As I continue my journey on letting the light be stronger than the dark, I hope you can all connect to the positive as well. Unfortunately, it’s isn’t always natural or the automatic response to stay positive and give no power to the negative but as we continue our journey, hopefully we can all stay connected and let the light be our most powerful source.

Love and light, Mercy